Basic Girl Problems Friday

I spent most of this evening petting and embracing one of the most adorable dogs I've thus far had the pleasure of encountering. Apparently the dog is a he, but I'm still not all too convinced. One person referred to the dog (it was a puppy, really) with the pronoun 'he'; the other referred to the dog with the pronoun 'she'. Merely asking could possibly have been taken offensively (since one is assumed to know a pet's sex after having had it for a month or so), so I didn't really want to take the possibly offensive path. Regardless of the sex, the dog was absolutely adorable and seemed to love me: it was an interaction I get from no human ever. I would totally adopt him/her/ambo/pan, because I'm never adoption an offspring of my same species going on the assumption that I'm human, even though I'm convinced that I'm at least half-Gorgon.

That was today, and now I must decide what -- if anything -- I am to do this weekend. During this time of the year, I oftentimes have hesternopothic flares particularly for studenthood at my alma mater. Though I had a miserable youth (just like Fräulein Maria says it in The Sound of Music) at that place, I hold on to the parts that were on the opposite end of the emotional association spectrum. Returning to my dorm of all four years after Summer Quarter was most definitely part of those joyous memories at my alma mater; I was even able to do so before everyone else returned for two of the four years. Here it is, x years later, and I still long for these times...even after the Northwestern student who has lost his life was an orientation leader for new students just like I was. May God be with his family and friends who attend that school.

To return from my digression, though, there is an Octoberfest spanning at least the north sides and peripherals of this city. I am a fan of bratwursts (both bratwursts, imaginary assholes), but beer of any kind and I are almost as inimical as Iran and Israel. Besides, there's a more local Octoberfest in the actual month of October that is more local and would help me save some percentage greater than 15% my material existence(?) insurance. Perhaps I'll get this flu shot, which is being gratuitously provided in places where I'd very likely leave out being cerebrally capped (i.e. the South and West sides). I just might need it this year, however, so:

Hey I just met you, and needles are scary
So here's my vein, flu shot me maybe

Actually, if I go to one of these gratuitous needlefests, I had better get the flu shot.


Last, and close to least, I have been followed by some people who are wholly incompatible with my account and tweeting style. How do I come off as a vegan when I brazenly discuss meat/my colossal universal figure with double entendres and meating? Or as a MYLF (wait until you see my picture!) who has a four-year-old? Or as one who not just salutes but also "lives for" {insert any other demonstrative adjective than 'my' here} troops?