Jan. 2nd, 2012

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A wave of Weltschmerz has diffused with and engulfed whatever other contents dwelled in my mind. I don't wish to converse with or engage in fuckerial times with any of my friends on Facebook; I don't even wish to read anything. Most alarmingly, there is only a modicum of desire to watch the remaining four episodes of Archer that haven't yet graced my existence (or lack thereof?) I just want to play Pokémon on my computer right now — and I hardly even wish to do that. The music can be hypnotizing, though, which would just get my suprachiasmatic nucleus and pineal gland even higher beyond utility than they already are; on the other hand, I could be paying off some of my sleep debt that is surely deeper in the red than that name of mine to which debt has accrued during my years in college. I inexplicably slept for over 12 hours today, so that should have paid off quite a significant amount of it — at the cost of feeling deathly because of it. This is terrible; even holding my head up seems to cost what feels like a paucity of reserve ATP. I've had cake twice this evening, so I should have plenty of energy! At least I accomplished tweeting...and birthday-calling my friend with whom I haven't corresponded in over two years.

Surely I sound as if I haven't ever overslept before, but this time seems different. Dear Doctor in Cuba, I'm not dying of anything, right?

Just Wonderings

  • Since I feel as if I'm dead and no longer exist (pardon the use of the first-person pronouns), can I be declared dead and have all my debt written off?

  • Does it count if, after still taking the stand against males' concupiscent untowardness toward us of the counterpart, I actually wanted it even when being mockingly objectified by such males?

  • Why didn't I take the Norwegian girl (I don't think we exchanged names) that I had just met to a lesbian bar up north that she wanted to see? If I were to get absolutely zero from some random, attractive guy, then she could have at least met a lovely girl.

  • Why did my alma mater decide to start the quarter two days after New Year's?

  • Am I the only one whose iTunes just starts seemingly of its own volition, i.e. with or without my consent — and why?

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narcississy

January 2013

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